I even help her get ready sometimes if she is running late.
I used to be the same way. I'd even do the dishes, or laundry when she was busy at the assembly, or going door to door all day.
These are called 'caretaking' behaviors. There's a difference between caretaking and helping out around the house. Does she change the oil in the car, or mow the grass when you work overtime? I'm willing to bet the answer is "no." Not saying there aren't some ladies who would do this, though.
Caretaking is when you do things to please her, hoping she'll recognize your 'nice guy' attributes. Cleaning, sweeping, helping her get ready for assemblies, ect. I learned my lesson, and finally just took on a philosophy that rhymes with "bucket." Just insert an F.
Instead of helping her get ready for assemblies, join the Rotary Club or something. You do YOUR thing, while she does HERS. Next thing you know...dishes stop piling up, & laundry gets folded.
Get your own group of non-JW man friends, if that's possible. Hang out with them sometimes. She'll get it after a while, that your not an appeasing doormat to be walked all over. It worked for me, but I'm not a JW, never have been. So, I'm not subject to the elder's wrath if I form 'bad associations.'
Check out the books I referenced earlier in this thread. Women...I think there are some things in there that would help you as well, esp if your married to an uber-JW elder type yes-man. I've found that many of them are 'nice guys' in the sense that they live to please the ORG. In other words, they take the caretaking role to the other extreme, of putting the ORG first. I think alot of women in this situation can 'MAN UP' in similar ways that the guys can. Good luck & be strong.
I try hard to keep the peace.
And that's the problem!! Stop trying to keep the peace. Stop walking on eggshells. Be your own man on your own terms. But, do what's RIGHT. Like Mr. Walton. Not to sound like a goddamn commercial, but I strongly recommend you read those books I mentioned. Another one is "Hold on to your N.U.T.S. (Non-negotiable, Unalterable Terms). " different author, but right on the mark.